sense of wonder
by tatty ted
Summary: She can't blame it on the alcohol when she's stone cold sober finishing her first glass of wine. - —Jeff/Tamzin, oneshot.


_extended scene if you like from "learning to fly"_

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**SENSE OF WONDER**  
_when you say those precious words_

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"You'd have lied for Samantha if you loved her."

"Like I lied for you?"

There's nothing spoken between the two as they stared at each other. It had been an emotionally tiring day and all Tamzin wanted to do was go home, have a bath and a glass of wine. The last thing she wanted was to reveal her feelings for Jeff.

She went to walk away but Jeff's hand on her arm stopped her. Realising she couldn't go any further and had to face what she'd said, she slowly turned around. Their eyes met and neither of them spoke, they didn't know what to say.

"Tamzin?"

She sighed, "please don't make this any harder than it is."

"What are you saying?"

She didn't want to admit it, there was nothing worse than admitting out loud how she really felt. It was wrong, these feelings she held for Jeff were wrong. It was borderline cheating, they may not have had any physical contact but thinking of him twenty-four seven wasn't right.

"Please Jeff," she watches as he removes his hand from her arm and turns to walk away heading back inside the hospital.

With a sigh Tamzin made the journey home by foot her mind occupied by thoughts of Jeff. She knew the right thing to do would be to dump her fiancé but she couldn't bear to hurt him. She loved him but not as much as she loved Jeff.

Reaching home she was relieved to find it empty, her fiancé deciding to stay at his own house tonight. Closing the door behind her, she turned on the light and left the keys on the small table by the door.

Kicking off her shoes as she walked into the kitchen she again turned on the light and headed for the fridge. Taking out the bottle of wine she poured herself a glass, sat at the table and contemplated the days events. Why couldn't anything run smoothly for her?

Tamzin can't remember how long she was sat there, running a finger along the rim of the glass staring into space but the sound of the doorbell ringing, broke her out of her thoughts. Biting her lower lip she wondered who was calling at this hour and hoped it wasn't her fiancé, she didn't want to see him today.

Peeping through the peep-hole she was shocked to find Jeff on her doorstep. Fumbling with the keys in the lock she pulled the door open, the cold air instantly hitting her and causing goose-bumps to appear on her arms.

"What do you want?"

"Can I come in?"

She sighed but figured it was easy to talk inside then out. Plus the street wouldn't gain her heating either. Opening the door wider and allowing him inside, Tamzin asked if she could get him a drink. Jeff declined, things like this were better discussed sober and not borderline tipsy.

They sat in the living room, nothing exchanged, the only sound that could be heard was the ticking of the clock.

"Why did you come here Jeff?"

"You know why, we need to talk."

"We don't need to talk about anything," she stood up and disappeared from the living room. Returning a couple of seconds later with the glass of wine she was enjoying earlier, she sat back down near Jeff.

"Yes we do."

She sighed and sipped on her wine, there was no denying she'd be forced to come clean about her feelings.

"Fine," she put the glass down on the table and made eye contact with Jeff, "I love you is that what you want to hear? It isn't going to change anything Jeff, I'm still engaged and I'm still going to have to pretend everything's okay."

Their eyes met again, "I want you to leave."

She stood up and slowly walked to the door, Jeff trailing behind her. As she opened the door, he stepped onto the doorstop and turned around to look at her. Again there was nothing but silence, "today made me realise how much you mean to me, how much I want to be with you Tamz!"

"It's never going to work."

"Why?"

She laughed slightly, "because this is us we're talking about, it just wouldn't work. Goodnight Jeff."

"Goodnight Tamzin."

She watched as he walked down the street disappearing into the darkness and closed the door. Locking it, she went back into the living room, sat down and picked up her glass of wine. Necking it she wondered why Jeff had to make her admit to her feelings out loud.

Now that'd be an awkward atmosphere to work in in the morning, and she couldn't exactly blame it on alcohol when she was stone cold sober.

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_**jottings** / is it wrong that i think Jeff/Tamzin is cute and adorable. if you like it enough to favourite, please leave a review:3_


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